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Getting ready to leave Aix has been one of the weirdest experiences so far. I have been quite homesick at moments so I have been very excited, but it does not feel real to leave. Aix has become a second home these past few months. Every time I returned from a trip I knew exactly where to go and what to do. The sound of someone speaking French became a soothing sound instead of a fear of what to say. It has become my normal.
I have talked about it with my host mother but the best word in French to describe everything I have been feeling is douce-amère, bittersweet. I have seen her just about every day for the past few months and I can’t imagine my days without her. Her cat, Lucille, has also been a goodbye I have been dreading. The way I have been coping is by making sure we will call each other, send letters, and possibly visit one another. It will be hard to maintain relationships from so far away, but at the end of the day, it seems extremely worth it. She has become one of my closest people.
Along with saying goodbye to my host family, I have to say goodbye to all of the friends I have made here. Sadly, all of my new friends are from different areas in the US. However, that makes it more fun to visit one another! Saying goodbye is always so hard, but I hope I will be able to see most of them again. The ones that I don’t I will hold and remember our abroad experience close to my heart.
On the flip side, I am so excited to be home in the States! I have missed my family and friends immensely and the Holidays are my favorite time to be home. I miss DU as well and cannot wait to be reunited with my friends there. Lots of fun things on the horizon to look forward to, which makes moving forward exciting as well.
Alongside my optimism, is the reality that adjusting to everything is going to be difficult. I am guessing I will be overwhelmed by all that is in store, but I think home will be a good change of pace. I am hoping things will not feel too weird, but honestly, I have no idea what to expect. I know I have changed while I have been away, so I think it’s important to be patient with myself along with everyone I am returning home to. I may feel left out on some experiences, but I would not change going abroad for anything.
