jessicamattoxx

Currently thinking about how time really does fly by as I am starting to say bye to friends, it truly is bittersweet. The goodbyes feel a bit different- we’ve made so many memories and become extremely close in terms of the international students at Otago and I don’t know who I will see again. I have my last final in a couple days and then I am completely done and leaving to travel with my family and head home. New Zealand takes a month for finals, so I’ve had some break time to travel and spend time with friends which was really nice. It just now has started to hit all of us that our time is coming to a close and none of us have answers regarding how to feel or act. This month was a combination of studying, traveling, keeping up with friends, and navigating an array of emotions. I haven’t had enough time to reflect and process the fact that I’m heading home soon and closing the chapter on New Zealand. Since we all have such varying schedules of when we end finals and go home, keeping track of when people are leaving has been a task in and of itself because I am scared to miss a goodbye. No matter what, these people and memories will always be with me, and for that, I feel truly grateful.

My friend Jessie Enjoying the Sun in Dunedin

After I finished two of my finals on the 18^th of October, I had a free week and decided to fly to Wellington with a couple of my friends. Wellington is the capital of New Zealand, an artsy city on the water that is just beautiful. I’ve only gone around the South Island so far and going to Wellington would be my first time going north. I packed my bags and prepared to wake up early for my 6:00 a.m. flight- I was honestly so excited to go on a plane and get out of Dunedin. Once I got there, I found my friend Emma at the airport, and we hopped on a bus into the city. I was so excited to be in the city, an actual big city. I love the South Island, but it is far less populated and there are no cities that even compare to those in the North. We could not check into our Airbnb until 2:00 pm and it was about 9:00 am at this point, so we spent the day exploring and shopping around. One of my favorite things is finding unique clothing stores, especially in New Zealand because the vintage shops are insanely good. Wellington, in my opinion, has the best shopping in New Zealand because the fashion is on another level. We were having so much fun exploring the city and I quickly decided that if I could live anywhere in New Zealand, it would be Wellington.

One of the best parts about the city is that you can walk to everything and there is also good public transportation. Another cool thing is that it is right on the water, so you still get that outdoor element. The city felt fake to me because of how cool it was designed. I love the outdoorsy trips I’ve been taking, but Wellington made me feel more in my element and reminded me of Denver or LA minus the water of course. We spoiled ourselves a bit with nice restaurants, cafes, and rooftop bars. Wellington had some of the best cafes because they are known for their coffee, and I will say the food was a lot better than Dunedin with loads of options. In terms of coffee, Midnight Espresso was my favorite place we went to. It had art all over the walls and it made me feel like I went back in time in the best way possible. The downside to Wellington was that everything was very expensive- the shopping, the food, housing. This is to be expected in this big of a city and there was nothing we could really do besides trying to be smart with spending.

While walking around the first day, we found the cutest jewelry shop right on the water outside of the city. The women who worked there were so sweet and genuinely interested in our time abroad and how we’ve been adapting to New Zealand. She is from the Wellington area, so she gave us some recommendations and we probably stayed in there chatting for 30 minutes before I finally decided to buy a necklace. After doing a little more shopping, we got some food and headed to the Airbnb to decompress because we were basically running on no sleep. Somehow, we entertained ourselves until 4:00 p.m. even though we could have checked in at 2:00 so by that point I needed some time downtime to feel like a person again. We decided to re-watch Gossip Girl, which ended up being the inspiration for my Halloween costume (so this was a crucial piece of information). After relaxing, we somehow got the energy to go out and meet one of my friends for a drink. This is the most random story that proves how small the world is that we live in. The only person I knew of in New Zealand before I came was a childhood friend named Piper whom I hadn’t seen since I was about 10 years old. Her mom is from New Zealand, so she has citizenship and I told her I was coming and would love to meet up. When we were out exploring that day, she texted me that she saw me walk by her work and I backtracked to go say hi. We reunited after over 10 years of not seeing each other randomly on the streets of Wellington (crazy, right?). Anyway, she ended up meeting me and Emma for a drink at a place called the library that she recommended. This was one of the coolest bars I’ve gone to. There was live jazz going on and the bar was actually like a library with a ton of old books. It was the perfect place to grab a drink and catch up after all that time.

The next day our friend Wyatt flew in and met up with us as well. The three of us were a fun group and we all got a lot closer on the trip considering we were sharing the smallest studio place that only had one bed. Despite that, it was great and quite sentimental because this was the last trip that I was going to take with my friends before finishing finals and heading home. We had a good day together at the Te Papa Museum- super cool exhibits with loads of history about New Zealand. We then took the cable car up to a lookout point and botanical gardens. I loved the restaurant at the top because the view was amazing, overlooking the whole city.

Since this was during Halloween time, Piper invited us to a party at one of her friends’ flats. We were excited but had nothing to wear and did some last-minute thrifting to pull stuff together. As mentioned, we started rewatching Gossip Girl, so I went as Serena and was decently proud because of how quickly it was put together. Meeting her friends made it one of the best parties I’d been to in New Zealand because of how nice everyone was. They genuinely wanted to get to know us all and were especially curious about me and Piper being from the same hometown. This was refreshing because sometimes the Kiwis can be quite judgmental towards Americans right off the bat. Some jokes were made, but overall, they were just funny, and I enjoyed getting the local experience.

The next day was beautiful out so we spent the day at the beach. I could physically feel the warm sun and my body getting tan- something I hadn’t experienced since being back in California. Another one of our friends, who studies at Otago, was in Wellington at the same time. She got a place outside of the city in the beach town area about 20 minutes from where we were staying. She was in the coolest Airbnb I’d ever seen. It was a treehouse that the owners built on the property, which happened to be the oldest home in that area, so the architecture was quite unique. We got lucky that we could visit her there and enjoy the treehouse/beach outside of the home. This was honestly such a smart idea by the people who lived there. They were still in the home but had two treehouses that they rented out on the weekends. The treehouse and surrounding area were such a cool thing to see and just being in the sun made me feel very content. The was a great last day in Wellington and we left early the next morning.

Now that I am back from Wellington, I feel such mixed emotions. It is getting very real that I will be saying bye in a week and leaving Dunedin for good. I feel so lucky for the people and experiences New Zealand has gifted me with. Despite the ups and downs, I wouldn’t change anything, and feel like I am coming out of abroad with a new perspective and outlook on life. I’ve also realized how it can be a good thing to miss home because that means I have something to miss. It’s been hard being away from my friends and family for such a long period of time. However, there is so much beauty in the fact that I can be in New Zealand and miss California and Colorado. For me, this was the perfect amount of time to be away because it was fun but also pushed me in certain ways to believe in myself with how much I can get through on my own. Also, I’ve never been truly alone here- I’ve had incredible people around me who have taught me a lot. So, I guess now I just make the most of the last bits of time I have with these people and truly cherish each moment.

After getting back from spring break, I had a whole second half of a semester ahead of me before going home. I had this weird feeling of burnout and lack of energy that never fully recovered. It was hard to come back to university life after the experience we had the week prior. I never knew how much I would cling to the memories from that trip and how grateful I was to have experienced it when I did. Around this time, my body started to demand that I slow down, and abroad became a lot harder.

For context, I was really sick before and after spring break and it’s been a constant struggle since I’ve gotten here. This was something I never thought about or that would get in the way of my abroad experience, but I have learned a lot from it and how to listen to my body. There is such a pressure to be so go go go while on exchange, which is fun for the time being. However, at a certain point, I was just tired and traveling was far down on the priority list. In the beginning, I brushed off the sickness and ignored how I felt because I was so focused on saying yes to every plan that was thrown at me. I am a natural introvert, but I pushed it socially and over time I got so drained without having my much-needed downtime. I was on antibiotics during spring break, which allowed me to feel better momentarily and road trip through New Zealand. Right when I got back, I got sick again, but far worse. I knew this was my sign to take it easy.

Physical health can really take a toll, especially when studying abroad and wanting to always be out doing fun things. I know that I have a weaker immune system overall but didn’t realize how bad everything would hit me while in another country. When I first got here in July, I had what felt like the common cold, but it lasted over a month, and I felt like I was getting worse rather than better. I was in the student health center on campus on and off just trying to figure out what was going on. While the on-campus doctors are good, I was constantly being told that this was normal for someone studying abroad. Although exposure to so many new illnesses can be normal when away, it was hard to navigate. I learned that it usually takes about 6 months for your body to adapt fully to the viruses in a new country- the amount of time that I was spending in New Zealand. For people with weaker immune systems, like myself, I feel like I was catching every new sickness that I was exposed to.

It got to the point of me being worried because I was only getting worse. This started to affect me mentally. I had to say no to multiple trips with my friends to prioritize my health. I feel like it can be normalized at the age of being in college to feel run down all the time and just push through and go on to the next adventure. It got to the point of me being so weak that I physically didn’t want to go anywhere because I knew I wouldn’t have a good time and it wasn’t worth getting sicker at that point. Another thing is that antibiotics and medication are not as commonly prescribed in New Zealand. It was really difficult to navigate health struggles in another country while on my own and I started to feel tired of having to constantly advocate for myself. It took me getting far worse to even be prescribed antibiotics. In the United States, we often go to a doctor with the expectation that they will just make us better or prescribe medication. I had to get used to the fact that not every country is the same, but I was frustrated because I knew I needed the medication.

If there is anything I can recommend- it is to know and understand the healthcare system and insurance before you leave for study abroad. I grazed over the study abroad handbook, not feeling like I would really need the information. The next thing I knew, I was in another country and trying to learn about how to find a doctor, insurance, and how much I would have to pay on top of feeling quite bad physically. The international SOS people through the University of Denver are actually really helpful and I wish that I reached out to them sooner. They explain the doctor and medical facilities in your area and also how the insurance and payment work.

In New Zealand, everything shuts down on the weekend. I had seen the school doctor during the week but got progressively way sicker over the weekend. I called international SOS and I decided that the urgent doctor was the best route. The urgent doctor is the only doctor in Dunedin that you do not have to wait over 2 weeks to see. The issue is, that they charge $200 upfront that you can later file an insurance claim for. This is a lot different than the US, and it is a lot to have to pay but I decided it was worth it because of the situation and just wanting to get better. I was skipping a lot of classes and struggling to keep up with schoolwork as well. All I wanted to do was lay in bed and honestly wished I could just be at home in California.

I was beginning to feel quite isolated from my friends and the loneliness was kicking in. I was falling behind in school, not seeing friends as much, and was starting to feel very on the outside socially. I have made awesome friends in New Zealand, which I am extremely grateful for. However, everyone was just in a different mindset than I was which was totally understandable. I wanted them to have the best possible experience and they wanted me to feel better. I knew I needed to take it easy, but it started to get old spending most days and nights on my own. Although hard, it taught me how to trust myself and how I am feeling.

The urgent doctor prescribed more antibiotics, which was good, and also recommended blood tests to check if there was anything else going on that was causing the sickness. I’m assuming that I had mono or something else, but they charge extra for that test and it just wasn’t worth doing when the treatment would be the same. On top of the medications, I’d bought and the doctor’s appointment, the blood test was another $200 ish. The medical expenses were starting to add up and it was slightly confusing how to submit the insurance claims.

Here’s what I learned: Student Safe insurance through the University of Otago takes a really long time to get back but they will help. I decided to go the route of talking to international SOS and using the insurance we have through the University of Denver called Star Companies. International SOS helps to provide a service of looking at insurance and payment options as well as giving medical advice to assess if going to a doctor is necessary. It was nice to reach out to them and have their support while I was away. They kept it all organized for me and sent step-by-step emails of what I needed to do next in terms of insurance and that was helpful.

After the second round of antibiotics, I finally am feeling a lot better. I am still trying to take it easy and just listen to my body- sticking to routines that work for me such as working out and eating healthy. While some things are unavoidable, I am doing a lot more now to prioritize my health and prevent illnesses rather than staying in the constant cycle. I am now in the final stretch of my time abroad, which means the stress of studying for finals is creeping in. In New Zealand, they do a month for finals so that they are spread out. Currently feeling slightly overwhelmed with balancing what I have to do for school, and what I want to do in terms of travel for the rest of my time here. The extra time for finals is nice and very different than DU, but it needs to be played strategically. It is easy to fall into the trap of not using the time to study and feeling like I have more free time without classes. There is an opportunity for more travel on weeks that do not need to be spent studying, but time management is necessary.

Many unexpected challenges arose this semester, and sometimes it is necessary for school to take second priority. Things really do get better and being abroad has shifted my mentality around how I deal with setbacks. Some moments have not been as glamorous as others, but it makes me appreciate the good even more now. I do want to finish strong with school and the rest of my time here. There is still so much to look forward to such as my family visiting me in New Zealand after finals and possibly going to Australia as well. Overall, there have definitely been ups and downs, but I am learning to stay present and take every situation as it comes.

Author: jessicamattoxx

Nearing the End

So, What’s Really Been Going on?