“I don’t know where we are, but it’ll be okay”

Being abroad, situations seem to change drastically and frequently. You can go from being so homesick that you’re looking at flights home to parading around a city you’ve always dreamt of in a matter of hours. Adaptability and flexibility are inevitable skills I’ve had to develop, but within that I’m constantly looking for things that feel like home and that feel comfortable. Whether things are good or bad, I’m always looking for things that bring me back to the past. However, I’m starting to realize that there is so much warmth and goodness to be had here as well.

I had a pinch me moment last night when I realized my constantly rotating stream of peers from various social activities is starting to evolve into a stable and comfortable group of friends. We all got together and baked and watched Harry Potter and had “girl talk” and despite having completely different backgrounds we connected so well and I felt at home for the first time since being here. So we’re having a big slumber party next weekend which I’m so excited for!!

In the same vain, I just made the decision to cancel my solo-trip that I was planning to take and go somewhere else with my friends here – which I felt really stuck on but I think realizing how much my connections here are making me feel full I would much rather sacrifice a place that will always be there for friends who may not always be so near.

I’m realizing that the sensation of craving home is just that: a feeling. Getting stuck looking to replicate past moments or exact places and people to feel happy never seems to quite do it, and it keeps you from finding it right where you are. In the moments where I want nothing more than to be back in Denver or at home, I remember what my mom has continued to gently remind me: You have you’re whole life to be at home in bed, but only 10 months in France.

Thanks for reading!! 🙂

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